Sunday, July 20, 2008

Win and Loosing in Games

Salamun alaikum avid readers, today I will write about our family’s new toy and insights I have had.

My husband has bought a Nintendo Wii for the family and along it some games and specially Wii Fit. This article may sound as an ad in a Newspaper, but I do not have any interests as such in the company.

As a couch potato with very little interest in training, except walking and being normally active, I would never believe that I would do exercises nearly every day at home. But this is what has happened.

I did have misgivings when my husband brought it home (another toy, money wasted and such), but he happily plugged it in and the first evening placed himself in front of the TV and started doing all kinds of strange things. And it looked fun…..

I could not help myself, I had to register myself into the program and do it also. And here comes my first insight, I am a poor looser. The exercises are made as a competition with yourself (and in my case also with my husband, as the movements are using only yourself and your own abilities and weight, no extra weight added, so competition is fair). So if he managed to do to a certain level, I also wanted to do at least as good. I also realized I mostly could, and in some times even go past him. But when he beat me, I sulked, my mouth turned down and I became the most un-fun person around. My husband threatened to refuse to train with me, he said there is a Norwegian saying “Tap og vinn med samme sinn”, loosely translated as “Loose or win with same mind”, and I should aim for that.

Did I like to realize I was a poor looser, no, definitely not! At the same time I really liked this game, this training of body, it was really addictive, I even trained sometimes in the daytime when I was alone, unbelievable.

My husband, he laughed and smiled and sometimes even did a victory dance if he beat himself or me, and when I beat him he smiled and were just as happy, no faking it. When he could not do something, he just did it again, enjoying it, and again.

Of course he was right, I had to change, and I am slowly doing it, but then he bought another game, “Big Brain Academy” where there is competitions, like both competing at same time, and as you truly understand, I failed miserably. Not that I was not as good as my husband, but when he won, I looked sour and sulked. Terrible, terrible, terrible.

Again my husband had to remind me that this is a game, for fun, for education, but NOT for becoming what I became. Did I agree with him; yes, will I change; YES.

So for two weeks now, I do have changed a little, I have to remind myself many times what this is, and my husband has not recently threatened to not play with me, so I know I am improving. So this is my own lesson for now, if you can learn something from it, well, that is why I wrote it.

And by the way, I have lost 2 kg and my husband 1,5 kg by just doing something we find to be fun (most of the time, ha ha).

Monday, July 14, 2008

Human Communication

Salamun alaikum avid readers, today I will write about communication.

I have thought a lot about communication lately, and tried to understand it. I have tried to see the steps humankind have taken until now, and as I understand it they are:

  • Speech
  • Pictures
  • Music
  • Games
  • Writing
  • Books
  • Paintings
  • Photos
  • Films
  • Interactive Games
  • Internet
  • Virtual Worlds

I can not claim that these are the correct sequence or all human endeavours, but it is a start.

From the Quran we learn that Adam was given the names of things and I assume the understanding to work with concepts. We are also told to “read” in the Quran, and to me it is just wonderful that a person can spend a long time researching and writing a book, and we the readers can go through it in a short time and gain a whole new experience.

The same can be said about films; in just over an hour we can look into a completely new world and gain an insight into something that may not even exist anywhere.

I am ever grateful that I live in a time where I can read and see films on a regularly basis and I feel blessed for all the experiences I can have through these media.

When I hear people saying about a book or a film that it is not real, that it is just fantasy, I really do pity them. It seems for them that fantasy is something bad, something to be avoided!? I ask myself why, why is it that some people have this narrow look at what experience they want to enjoy?

Many of the things we take for granted these days where just fantasy at some time, and many people ridiculed those that where searching or inventing some things not yet developed.

In groups in Islam and also in groups in other religions there are those that shun fantasy and want to limit human experience to what they see as the righteous life and experience. To me they paint a grey and limited world. I could ask then, is Allah without fantasy? Looking at His glorious creation I would say He truly has a magnificent fantasy and creativity unsurpassed. Just look at the multiple appearances of animals, plants, insects and all growing things. Even us humans with all our racial traits, just look at any race how wonderful different we all look.

I know these days we have put a very narrow standard to what we consider beautiful, and some will do anything to fall into this limited standard, but if we free our self of this trained way of looking at human beauty there is endless beauty to be found.

Back to my list of communicative expression, we see that there is a wealth of possibility to communicate just about anything, for good or for bad. I for one hope and truly believe that these means will be mostly used in ways that will make this world better for us all.


Wednesday, July 09, 2008


Salamun alaikum avid readers, today I will write about change.

In my last musing I wrote about mood swings and feelings and that they need to be looked at and somewhat controlled. I firmly believe that to be in the sway of ones feelings is a mental state that needs to be addressed. Re-read it, to see the background for today’s writing.

So if one has a situation, where ones emotion put one in a certain mood and you express this mood loud, hateful, and crying or whiningly, are you then in a position to clearly express what change you want? Is it not a kind of blackmail to use those emotions, and if you get your way, will you not continue using those emotion? The person receiving that outburst will he or she pity you or hate you for it? Both emotions do not build a balanced partnership, do they?

Life is change. Seasons come and go, people change and grow old, interests come and go and whatever you once had will somehow change.

This frightens many people, that whatever they had changes, but they do not realise that they too change – but slowly over time.

So is change bad? If our mind did not get bored or were searching ever for new experiences we would never go forward. Looking at our friends and family we can see that some embrace change and some shun it, some even fear change, but we as Muslims should not afraid. We Muslims should fear to sin, we should fear not to behave as Allah has guided us, but we should not fear change. As we all know there are those Muslims that want to live in the past, they dress in old time’s clothes, and they do not embrace technology and so on. That is their choice and I see no problem as such, but they seem to fear society and that is wrong. Society is not to be feared; Muslims are to be strong and by example should change it for the better for all.

So what have this to do with emotions?

I try to point you to the idea that to be a participant in positive changes and that goes for any change of any situation that YOU have to be calm and to know what changes you want. That you need to express the words in a way that there can be dialogue and both sides can be heard in a calm and friendly way.

This is not an easy task, I do not for a moment pretend to be the most calm and thoughtful woman out there, especially when my husband irritate me. But my reflections on this subject are something I do work on, and I truly believe we all have to still our minds and in calmness address our grievances.

Control of our mind is to control the influences done by Satan also, so again think about the words; positive, optimist, faithful, strong, happy, giving, mental discipline and love.


Thursday, July 03, 2008

Mood Swings

Salamun alaikum avid readers, today I will write about mood swings.

What do I mean by this? Well as we all know and especially us women (but applies to most men also), we change moods, sometimes rather unexpected and fast. A mood is usually a result of a feeling or a situation we feel “pisses us off”. Most of us are very righteous in whatever we feel, like our feelings are true and we are in our right to feel whatever we feel at any given point.

But is it true? Let us look beyond ourselves for a moment. Our mood certainly will influence those around us, that is true, but does that alleviate our own “suffering”? Sometimes it does; ie. if I feel bad then you should feel bad also.

A question that needs to be asked is; do we have the right to feel the way we feel and to express whatever we feel? Most people answer YES to this. But if we generate MORE misery around us by expressing our feelings, is it not something we should really look at and maybe in many cases CONTROL?

Is it not a sign of weakness to give in to any mood or feeling coming our way?

Think about the words; positive, optimist, faithful, strong, happy, giving, mental discipline and love.

Do those words ring a bell? Do we actually have a choice here? Do we?

Who is the master hypnotist? Who is it that wants to drag us down, to loose hope, to see every situation in the worst light? Who?

Satan of course.

Do we actually have a choice of what to feel and what mood we are to have? Most people say NO, I say YES. We do have a choice, and Allah is our guide and strength in this.

Does this mean we should blindly feel good about everything and do not change a situation that needs to be changed? NO, and I will try God willing to write about this in my next musing.

A good article can be found by this link: